Outside Reading #3

Recently, in the last few chapters that I have been reading Craig has sort of appealed to me. Just the fact that he has been trying so hard to "get better" and fit in with everyone else is just making me think of him as someone totally different that what I thought of before. In a way I can relate myself to Craig. When he tries at something, he has to give his 100% and work really hard, and then he gets far. But if he takes a break for example drinking and drugs for him, he gets off track. That’s not the case for me but if I am doing really well for a while I tend to slack off and it’s harder to get into that rhythm of doing well and balancing everything. Craig also reminds me of myself with some of the weird things he does. Things such as noticing small details, or having weird quirks about food. Like Craig, I have a very sensitive stomach. I don’t throw up like he does, but I experience pain from acid dyspepsia. It’s not as serious as what Craig has and it’s definitely not an eating disorder but I do have pain in my stomach often as Craig does. Surprisingly Craig isn’t the depressed kid that rebels against his parents, he embraces them and they support him an unbelievable amount. You would think that Craig is just a regular teenager that doesn’t get along with his family, but that’s so not the story. He gets along with them so well, he even sleeps in the same bed as his mom the nights that he doesn’t feel well. I didn’t fully understand what triggered his depression at first, because even he doesn’t know, but as the story went on I began to realize. I realized that once he did start studying harder for the important test he wanted to take the more and more uptight and anal he got towards people. Instead of hanging out with his friends on Fridays he would sit home and study flash cards repetitively. What I believe started his downfall is after he took the test he felt no need to study and work hard anymore. He took one break at a party and everything seemed to go down in flames after that for Craig. He suddenly wanted to party every weekend, do drugs, drink, etc. Craig wasn’t able to find a balance between work and play. Therefore he ended up at the hospital the night he was thinking about committing suicide. A prediction I have for him in the next coming chapters of the book is replacing his old friends who are bad influences, with new friends that are healthy for him. I predict that there will be tension between him and his choices. Hopefully in the end Craig realizes he needs to find a balance in his life.

Outside Reading #2

The more I read the more I pick out things about Craig that are so different from other people, and that confuse me. His personality is so different and he knows exactly what he wants and what he wants to do all the time. Craig has friends and he does these experiments to see if he's getting better or worse in the means of depression. One week he'll smoke a ton of pot, one week he won't. And the effect is the same, he's still as depressed as before. There's something he calls, "The Shift" throughout the book and to him it means his brain is being able to slide into the spot it's supposed to be in. To me it means for him to be completely okay and normal.At times I feel like Craig is choosing not to get better, he won't, but sometimes I feel like he can't. Like there is a chemical imbalance in his brain that is keeping him from acting the way he is supposed to act. That's hard to believe though because of all the opportunities he's been throwing away. Another term he uses are Tentacles-evil invasions that invade his life. Then Anchors-things that occupy his mind and make him feel good temporarily. I think the auther capitalizes these words in the book because they want the reader to see how Craig's thinking, categories for regular, everyday things. He also always wastes a ton of time each day being unproductive and doing things that don't do any good. For example, lying in his bed for hours on end instead of doing his homework (which he doesn't do by the way) It may sound like he's just being lazy, but it may be something deeper than that.

Outside Reading #1

I picked It's Kind of A funny Story by Ned Vizzini for my ouside reading book. So far the main charactor Craig is sort of getting to me. Craig is suffereing from depression and in the first couple of chapters I began to see through his eyes and start to comprehend how his brain works. What bothers me is how much money and effort his family is putting into him when they have so little to spare. Craig is so caught-up in the past and because of that can't think about the present. I understand depression is a difficult thing to overcome but Craig is just so weird. It started off when he was about four and had a breakdown because he couldn't trace the map of Manhattan and it continues now to things like, physically not being able to eat or he'll throw up. Or havin his favorite place in the world be the bathroom with all the lights off. Or even little things like knowing the answer to a question in class but when called on, he physically can't speak or get the words out without stuttering. I feel as if he could be normal if he just tried. That's what makes me so frustrated. I don't know how his family can withstand him and watch Craig throw away everything he's worked for. His sister Annie learns from it. She sees his failing as motivation for her to do better and be better in all aspects of her life. Craig has gone and tried so many things to help him, I am itching to find out if he ever gets better and looks forward instead of back in his everyday life.